he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
