I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
