Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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