Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
