Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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