the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
