I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Randomize