We should be called the Road Head Warriors
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
