Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
