Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
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