i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Randomize
