Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
