just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
