Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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