He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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