It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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