So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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