community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
