i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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