k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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