Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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