Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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