i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
