Fine. I'll sleep in my office
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
