lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
