my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
