Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
