I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
