How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
its liver damage thursday
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
