Your tits are I can't wait for
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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