Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
