I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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