How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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