my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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