I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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