with your own penis?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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