We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
