meet me or not, i'm out of control
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Randomize
