Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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