just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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