Dual....:-)
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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