Slut skills are useful in every country.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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