Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
