He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
