A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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