There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
