I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize