I am in a vortex of obligation.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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