Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
