Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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